Dear Friend,
You’re in my thoughts today. Where I am, we are experiencing a spring snow. I'm cuddled in fleece and listening to a CD and the choir is singing a beautiful song reminding me that God knows my name. Imagine that? The God of the universe knows me by name.
He knows you by name, too. I'm wondering as pen my musings if you know how truly valuable you are? You are a person of incredible worth and value. Not because of what you can or cannot do, where you live, who your friends are, your family heritage, but just because you are you. Do you believe what I've just said?
Most of us look at ourselves through the lens of others perceptions. We see ourselves the way others tell us that we should. Does that make sense? Someone says, “You’re worthless (or, dumb, or ‘nobody cares about you‘).” If it comes from someone close to us - like a spouse, a parent, a sibling, a friend - we may decide that just because they said it, it’s true even if it's not.
Be careful what you accept into your spirit from others. All of us have people in our lives who don't know how, or because of their own woundedness they simply can't, "be there" for us. Still others, as author Joyce Landorf Heatherly once wrote, are irregular people - they don't care, and they don't care that they don't care. For whatever reason, my guess is that you've had your share of people in your life who have hurt you deeply. Some have wounded by refusing to acknowledge your existence, others abuse in a myriad of ways some of which you may be all too familiar.
In my letter to you today, I want to talk about those who use their words are verbal arrows. Words are powerful. The Bible has a lot to say about them. Proverbs 15:4 tells us that kind words help and heal, but cutting words wound and maim. We are cautioned that our words are so powerful that they can speak life or they can speak death (Proverbs 18:21) to another's spirit.
When we feel the sting of that first arrow we might say, “Ouch, that hurt! But, what they said isn't true!” The second arrow hits its mark and we being to wonder, “I didn't think it was but maybe it IS true.” If we're not careful, we may begin to believe a falsehood as truth, “What they are say is true!” Soon we’re living our lives based on a lie.
People who tear down other people are not safe people. The key words there are "tear down." Listen my friend, we all fail; we all have faults. No one has yet reached perfection, though there are those who would have us think they have. Unsafe people are not the people you need to listen to. Tune your ears to those who have proven themselves to team players in your life. Those who have have accepted that you, warts and all, are a gift to them.
Alas, there may be those in your life who have said and done some pretty stupid things to you. Listen, what they have said and done is not an accurate reflection of the value and importance of you. You need to know that you are significant, and a great treasure. You have value and worth just because you are you. Your childhood and where you are today is only a small piece of the story of your life; it is not the whole. The painful events that have occurred are just that - events. They do not define who you are. YOU define who you are; YOU determine where you will go in life by the choices you make. Those choices will form the story line upon which your coming life chapters will be written, and ultimately how your book ends.
Regardless of the circumstances of your birth, you were a wanted. When God planned you, He shaped you into the image of His own self. (Genesis 1:26-28) He breathed His own breath into you (Genesis 2:7) and said, “This child is good. Very, very good. I want this child to live.”
He had a purpose in mind for you. Scripture tells us that when God made you, He shaped you first inside and then out. He didn’t just arbitrarily throw you together. He crafted you to specification! He knows every bone in your body. He knows when you sit and stand. So much does He love you, so well does He know you that nothing escapes His attention . . . right down to the number of the hair on your head. He sculpted you from nothing and made you into something! He watched you grow from conception to birth, and prepared the days of your life before you had even lived one day. He knows your thoughts, your feelings, your sorrows and joys. He embraces you on your journey, longs to walk with you, to guide you, to give you courage, comfort, and hope. (Psalm 139)
David Meece is a popular Christian singer and songwriter. He grew up in a home that was less than ideal. His father was an alcoholic. One night, when David was eleven years old his father, in a drunken rage, snatched him up out of bed, held a gun to his head, and told him he was going to kill him because he was worthless and never should have been born.
David hadn’t seen his father since he was a child. When he learned of his father's death, he chose to attend the funeral. Immediately after the service, he left to go on tour. His heart was heavy with sadness and grief. In his hotel room, he laid down on the bed, crying out to the Lord. He wept, laying his brokenness in the arms of God. He says that as he cried and prayed he felt a sense of release and he knew that God was healing him of the damage his father had done. David now sings about what he did that night, "In my brokenness, in my hour of darkness, I will lift the pieces of my heart to You."
